well, it's been a long time, and i still don't have anything good to write about. next week, i'll be visiting the Chocolate Bar at Cafe Fleuri in Boston, and that will undoubtedly result in a ginormous post, but until then...

this past weekend, i went to see Anita Baker in concert at Pala Casino. she is my all time favorite A-#1 singer, so you could say i was pretty excited. the concert was not bad; she sounded great, but the venue was pretty much crap. nonetheless, a good time was had by all...



but this blog is not about r&b artists, so let's talk about Pala's buffet. i gotta say, i was kind of impressed. so far Barona has been my standard for "good" buffets outside of Las Vegas, but i'd have to rank Pala a close second. turns out Saturday is "steak and shrimp night," which sucks because i do not enjoy either steak or shrimp, but there was plenty of other stuff for my grazing enjoyment.



but of course my real focus is on the desserts. i was impressed first and foremost by the cannoli-- i don't know if these were fresh out of the kitchen or what, but the shells were actually CRISP. usually the filling works quickly to soggify the shell, resulting in a gross semi-solid mass that bears almost no resemblance to a legit cannoli. i don't know that i've ever encountered a better buffet cannoli (tho still not in the same league as the REAL THING from an italian bakery).

their chocolate chip cookies were studded liberally with semisweet chocolate, but had an odd sour aftertaste, so i have to give those a pass. the tiramisu was exceptionally creamy, and although dusted with cocoa powder, remained somewhat bland. i preferred the white chocolate raspberry mousse cups, which maintained that luxurious texture along with, you know, some actual flavor.

i found it interesting that they served a variety of bar cookies, which are probably extremely cheap to produce but suitably tasty. one unidentified item tasted lightly of cinnamon, walnuts and white chocolate. the other was nothing more than a Magic Bar, but i happen to like these and they were executed well enough.

Pala also had an assortment of cream puffs, ice cream, warm desserts like cherry cobbler and bread pudding, fruit tarts, etc. all in all, there was lots to choose from, including plenty of sugar-free options. verdict: worth the $20. but especially because my friend paid :p

opinions vary, but i think "candy season" begins in middle september, as the back-to-school junk gets shoved off into a dirty corner and the halloween stuff gets pulled out. then, for the rest of the year, it's candycandycandycandycandy (admittedly a bit of a lull between halloween and christmas, but that seems to be getting shorter every year...)

last night i noticed that target had almost finished setting up this year's halloween offerings. say what you will about target (and i have plenty to say, believe me-- but that's a subject for a different blog), i think they have the cutest/most unique holiday stuff of any mass-market retailer.

anyway, i picked up a bag of "toasted s'mores" gourmet candy corn. i believe these are manufactured by Galerie (warning: annoying, uninformative flash site). i love s'mores and i love candy corn, so how could i go wrong??? well, here are a few things i've learned over the years:

(1) chocolate "flavored" items are usually a waste of time. if it doesn't actually contain chocolate, it's not going to come even close to approximating the chocolate experience. since chocolate is such an integral part of a s'more, you can imagine that the candy corn incarnation kind of misses the mark in this regard.

(2) sometimes you just can't improve on the classics. i happen to love the sweet simplicity of traditional candy corn, so most variants pale in comparison. this includes indian corn (meh) and mellowcreme pumpkins (bleh).

(3) printing the word "gourmet" on a label automatically disqualifies it from actually being a gourmet product.

so, first things first: rather than the standard white-yellow-orange color scheme, these are white-tan-brown. and they have an inconsistent appearance: some are blistered, some have bubbles or cracks or white spots throughout. gotta say, i'm not all about appearances when it comes to candy, but these kind of look like something you'd find on the bottom shelf at your local dollar store.

the smell is... uh... not like s'mores at all. actually, i'm not quite sure what these smell like. the first things that come to mind are: SUGARY. maple. coffee. you can detect a very faint whiff of artificial graham cracker in the background, but it's subtle and seems to magically come and go.

the texture is pretty good. one of the things i don't like about some brands of candy corn (BRACH'S) is the high moisture content. i prefer candy corn to be slightly dry and crumbly, followed by a quick melt.

so it's not that these are particularly bad, and the colors are an interesting counterpoint to the candy corn of your youth. i just don't think i'd ever guess they were supposed to taste like s'mores unless it was printed right there on the label, and at the relatively high price (as compared to regular old candy corn) i doubt i'd buy them again.

target also had a few other varieties, including cotton candy and green apple.

part of the joy of being a known junkfood junkie is that friends, neighbors and well-wishers often contribute to your stockpile of goodies. the downside is, those of us with very little willpower have a tough time keeping myself from blowing through 18 lbs of chocolate in the course of a weekend.

at any rate, none other than Caramel Apple Hershey's Kisses showed up on my desk this morning. what a thrill! regular caramel hershey's kisses were one of the first variants to debut a few years ago, and remain one of my favorites. i vastly prefer rich, buttery, flowy caramel to the sticky/chewy variety, so these are right up my alley.

reports are that these are now available in the seasonal dept of your local Wal*Mart. but enough free advertising-- how do these taste?

caramel hershey's kisses were one of the first variants to debut a few years ago, and remain one of my favorites. i vastly prefer rich, buttery, flowy caramel to the sticky/chewy variety, so these are right up my alley.

the caramel apple edition kicks it up a notch (#$(#$ you, emeril) by adding a healthy dose of artificial apple flavor. i gotta say, fake or not, i think these are pretty damn good. the caramel is rather liquidy and tastes like a big ol' granny smith, with some floral notes and a juicy tartness that is fairly convincing. maybe a little too strong for the average consumer, but it reminds me of Charm's Caramel Apple Pops, which i also adore.

so, hershey's is apparently on a roll with their limited editions right now, as i've enjoyed both these and the Pumpkin Spice. well, except for the vile candy corn variety, which are ridiculously cute but taste like you've been huffing a can of Pam non-stick artificially flavored butter spray. bleh.

well, not much going on in junkfoodland these days. i've been out of town a lot, so maybe i should just talk about the food (junky- and non-) that i had recently in Las Vegas.

personally, i am not a huge fan of Las Vegas, especially in late August-- it's way too hot to do anything except busy yourself inside the hotel. i don't really gamble, i don't drink, i don't like corny standup or cher, so what do i do in Vegas? eat, of course! and since this trip was on the company, i made sure to make the most of it.

(1) Bellagio Buffet -- this is a "fancy" Vegas buffet, with food that's a couple notches above what you'll find at your friendly neighborhood Hometown Buffet (and substantially more expensive). seems to me that the quality has declined somewhat over the past couple of years...

the food was "ok" but a lot of it tasted strange, not sure if it's by design or they're just cheaping out on ingredients. for example, their carrot cake looks ultra fancy, but is overwhelmingly pineapple-y. personally i don't like any pineapple in my carrot cake at all, and this tasted more like a pineapple upside-down cake than a carrot cake. scandalous! similarly, their sweet potatoes were drowned out by too much orange juice, so barely tasted like sweet potatoes at all. my favorite item on the buffet was their soft serve ice cream, and that's kind of sad.

(2) Fleur de Lys -- here was my opportunity to see how the other half lives! to be fair, i am really not a gourmet kind of guy. after all, i had no problem eating at Chipotle every week for several years. here's what i had, as best as i can remember:
- Trout-Something-Or-Other Amuse Bouche
i thought this was absolutely disgusting, but you know, it's trout. bleh.
- Lobster Medallions with Microgreens and Mango Confit
i am admittedly not a huge fan of lobster, so that part didn't bowl me over. the microgreens were bitter. mango confit? i guess that's supposed to be preserved in sugar, but it just tasted like plain ol' mango to me.
- Organic Guinea Hen with Asparagus Risotto
this was fine, but not exactly thrilling. the hen was exceptionally moist and the risotto was cooked well. thankfully i did not seem to have a problem with asparagus-scented pee after this meal :p
- Chocolate Tasting
well, it's chocolate, how can you go wrong!? chocolate banana cake, mocha gelato with chocolate crumbs, chocolate ganache tart... all pretty good, although you start to get tired of all that chocolate after a short while (believe it or not)
- Petits Fours
not really petits fours, but more of a random assortment of tiny post-dessert desserts. everyone else was beyond full by this point, so i ate most of them :) included a delightful raspberry macaron and a fresh, soft, buttery salted caramel.
my favorite part of this meal was the bread. that also seems kind of sad.

(3) Bayside Buffet (Mandalay Bay) -- i'd never been here before, and i gotta say, this place is pretty nice. for a buffet, the decor is rather sophisticated and there's lots of windows/natural light which i found refreshing. sadly, i did not get to spend a lot of time here because of work issues, but i would definitely come back. the pizza was great (fresh, crisp crust. lots of cheese!) and the desserts were top notch (so much better than Bellagio... these actually looked cute and tasted good, like the fruit tart in a delicate dark chocolate shell or the banana creme cake)

(4) Smith & Wollensky -- it's a steakhouse, so you know i won't be too impressed. later i heard that pretty much everyone was disappointed with the quality of the steaks here. i ordered the lemon pepper chicken, which again was "fine" but nothing spectacular (except for the portion size, which was ridiculously massive...) for dessert, chocolate cake. i can do better.

(4) Le Village Buffet (Paris) -- disappointing. the food here is not bad, but either they've stopped making my favorite item (the pistachio + lemon macaron) or they only serve it with the dinner buffet. i did enjoy the pork loin with rhubarb chutney, and their chocolate chip cookies, while bearing no apparent relation to the Paris theme, are pretty damn good.

wow, that was a long post about nothing, and even though it seems like a lot of whining, i actually had a pretty good time :) i'll try to conjure up some new candy to write about next time.

as summer winds down, candy season starts up again. halloween is just around the corner (well, maybe down the block and around the corner) and i happened to spot the elusive Pumpkin Spice Hershey's Kisses at my local Target (no sign of caramel apple, though...)

my first thought upon opening the bag: they sure do reek, kind of like a bag of potpourri, and not exactly appetizing. unwrapped, the kiss is a pleasant halloween-y shade of toasted orange. i'm guessing the coating is just colored, unflavored "white confection" (i tried to pick off just the coating and couldn't really discern a flavor, but i'm not entirely sure). inside, a creamy white filling that is extremely sweet but does indeed have that pumpkin spice kind of flavor.

off the shelf, these are not that great; they are simply TOO SWEET and the texture is soft and fudgy, as if they're already partially melted. however, here are two suggestions to improve your Pumpkin Spice Hershey's Kiss experience:

1) Pop 'em in the fridge for a while. Chilled, these are somehow quite a bit more palatable than they are freshly-purchased. The texture is more akin to a standard Kiss and it is easier to bite off the bottom of the kisses and eat the pumpkin creme (uh, that is, if you're into that sort of thing...)

2) Eat them while enjoying a cup of strong black coffee. This helps IMMENSELY and in fact makes the whole experience quite a bit like enjoying a Pumpkin Spice Latte from Starbucks. Those of you who don't like coffee... hmm... not sure what to tell ya. i'll just say that i was leaning towards a negative opinion of these UNTIL i had them with coffee, and now i'm rather fond of the little buggers.

so, that's it, my first limited edition of the season. i'm sure there are tons more on the way :) :) :)

i also had occasion to attend the "Celebrity Food Show" in beautiful downtown Anaheim, California over the weekend.

if you're expecting a massive exhibition hall filled to the brim with all sorts of decadent delicacies, well, simmer down. it was actually held in the ballroom of a hilton, so it was quite a bit smaller than anticipated.

if you're expecting dozens of A-list celebs wandering the halls and bantering with the common-folk, well, you're mistaken. i did get to see a presentation by Food Network celebrity chef Duff, from TV's Ace of Cakes, but that's about it. not to detract from his celebrity status (the crowd was WILD for him), but he's just a dude who makes slightly above average cakes. he (and geoff, and especially mary alice) seem really nice and fun, though, so it was a good time.



anyway, back to the food. here are some of the things we stumbled upon:

fiorentino super supreme ice cream: my favorite item of the show, i had a scoop of sour cream gelato with a squirt of mango mint coulis. sounds kinda weird, but really tasty and unique enough to be worth a second (and third, and fourth) look.

brandini toffee: recipe developed by a couple of kids in between listening to Hannah Montana and reading back issues of Tiger Beat. actually, it was pretty good: nice texture, not too hard, didn't stick to the dental work, not cloyingly sweet. kudos to you, young chilluns

bubbles baking company: they only sell wholesale, and their desserts were not remarkable. attractive, yes, but my cheesecake is way better. :)

the jesus cookie: um. all religious junk aside, jellybeans do not belong in cookies. i can not be persuaded otherwise.

boss nova juice company: they were handing out full bottles of this stuff all over the place. i was excited to try the "acai and passion fruit" variety, but i gotta say, i really didn't care for it. maybe it was just too exotic for me, kind of like a peppery cranberry juice cocktail. meh.

anyway, it was fun, but i think i've got my eye on this for next year.

i am a huge fan of malt, in candy or milkshakes or in a teaspoon straight out of the jar (well, maybe not so much.) i am not as huge a fan of malt liquor, but i suppose there's still time to up my street cred. at any rate, one of the first candies in which i encountered malt was the venerable Whoppers, which has a decently malty center, but covers it all in a thin layer of waxy fake chocolate (thanks, Hershey's, for your continuing efforts to destroy chocolate!)

much better are the malted milkballs that are covered by like 1/2" of genuine milk chocolate, such as these beauties manufactured by the georgia nut company. a good malted milkball is OMG GOOD, and something that i can easily eat until i become violently ill. if that's not a ringing endorsement, i don't know what is.

but, back to Whoppers. recently, as with practically every other product these days, a selection of "limited editions" have appeared on store shelves. i've seen both reese's peanut butter Whoppers and strawberry milkshake Whoppers. this past weekend, i indulged in the strawberry milkshake variety, and i must say, they're kind of not so great.

to be fair, it's not easy returning to the waters of mockolate after you've been swimming around in the real thing for so long. at least this doesn't really even pretend to be chocolate, with a coating that smells like lip balm and is disturbingly flesh-colored.

these are far from inedible, they're just really, really sweet. i still like the slightly salty hit of the maltball center, but the coating is overpowering. i don't quite get the milkshake flavor, just a vague (VERY vague) fruity essence behind a waxy sweet-sweet-sweet coating. i still ate quite a few of them-- no surprise there-- but i probably would not buy them again. i'll stick with real chocolate with real cocoa butter, thanks.